i may or may not be watching the land before time
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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