I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
