Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
