I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
