I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
