I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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