I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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