I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Randomize
