Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
