Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
