Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
