stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
we're making bets on your personal life
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
