Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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