wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
