It's Friday. Sex?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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