he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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