i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
only if we run a train.
done.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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