Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
