I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
