ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
