This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Of course I have a pirate flag
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
