Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
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found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
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Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
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