Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
It's Friday. Sex?
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
