i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
