They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize