I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
