guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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