i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
