im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
