All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
