There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
he puts the penis in happiness.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
