More tranny stories later!
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
