considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
