I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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