let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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