its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
