Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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