BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
