i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
