I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Enjoy the penises
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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