Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
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nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
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I FOUND THE LEGS
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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