Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
