that's an acceptable place to lick
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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