I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Randomize