i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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