I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
