She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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