We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
