First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
