How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Randomize
